10 April 2010


I know I might sounds crazy, but it's 3:15 in the morning and I am going to go photograph. I can't sleep, partly because I am setting my sleep cycle for Australia, and partly because I have things on my mind. It's too quiet in the house since everyone is asleep. I feel like a failure at photography. I don't feel like I make very good photographs anymore. Sometimes when I look at other people's work, it's like watching someone who can do a killer workout without even making it look hard. Sometimes I wonder if I'm loosing my edge, if I ever had one to begin with. I've made a few cool photographs lately, but I don't feel like I am doing anything worthwhile. I feel like I should be accomplishing something. It's hard to even make myself go photograph. That's literally what I have to do. I have to force myself to make a photograph. I love taking pictures. I love the end result when I get something good. I know that I am capable of making good images. I need some moral support or something. I just feel like this is sad. I am venting about creative stress and inactivity to whoever. I don't even know if anyone reads any of this. I guess if the only thing it ever gets used for is for me to write down my thoughts, then OK. I'm gonna go make myself go take some pictures. Pray that I don't chicken out. Or give up.

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